Mum's Day? Nope, it's Me Day

7am this morning a reminder flashed up on my phone, ’check cupboard’ it says. I’m always putting random events in my phone so I just put it down to my preggers brain and carried on snoozing. Of course I was supposed to look in the cupboard for my card and chocolates, the reminder had been secretly programmed by my husband which I didn’t realise until he came home from his nightshift. So I spent the first moments of Mother’s Day feeling bemused and a little stupid. Little L went in the cupboard, found the goodies and handed them to me. She's too young to fully understand what's going on and within two minutes of reciting 'Happy Mother’s Day' to me she’s asking for her breakfast and pulling her wet overnight nappy off.

All I really want from Mothering Sunday is to choose exactly what I want to do. A few cups of tea thrown in my general direction, no nappy changes or getting dressed dramas. I don’t need to be wined, dined and have Interflora deliver a small florist’s inventory to my house. I want to watch my Twin Peaks box set without worrying if its too scary for toddler or spend an hour drying and straightening my hair just to remind myself how its done.

Ironically, I’m more aware this Mother’s Day of those who won’t be celebrating. These events can make people aware of precisely what’s lacking in their life. A friend recently made me aware of the Count the Kicks Campaign, to encourage awareness of your babies development during pregnancy. Started by Sophie who lost her daughter Chloe in the final stages of pregnancy, their Twitter feed diffuses messages of support and encouragement to women who were robbed of being a mother this year by losing a child. I also have a friend whose mum is seriously ill in hospital today. Although the family will be there to support her, they will be looking at half the woman they acknowledge as their mum in body.

That is why when I wrote my card out to my mum, I stopped and thought hard before composing my message. Naturally, she’s the ‘best mum in the world‘, I love her inexplicably, unconditionally but it’s the supportive advice and practical help that really makes the difference. The fact she tries to understand what I want and need out of life right now and helps me to make it happen. It her empathy and selflessness which, for me, truly defines motherhood.

To find out more about Count the Kicks visit: www.countthekicks.org.uk

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