Some films are immune to criticism. Take the romantic comedy Did You Hear About The Morgans?, where Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker play an estranged New York couple who are forced to spend time together in backwoods Wyoming under the witness protection program after they accidentally stumble across a brutal murder.

Someone could make the observation that the film's humour is so light and gossamer thin it wouldn't bend an angel's eyelash, but fans of Hugh's stock-in-trade stammer ('I-I-I-I think I love you') and SJP's cervine visage (Ay-Ay-Ay-Ay Moosey) would still lap it up. And if it were pointed out that SJP's whiney socialite Meryl Morgan is so irritating it's a wonder the good folk of Wyoming don't plaster the address of her hideout all over the internet, lovers of Sex And The City (essentially, The Fast Show's 'she's different with men' sketch stretched out over six TV series and two films) wouldn't care a jot. And it would be pointless to complain about both leads being capable of so much more (him, About A Boy; her, Ed Wood) when the contemporary romcom genre invariably sets the bar at 'heartwarming' and 'cute'.

Also doing exactly what it says on the tin is Invitation Only, which is heralded as Taiwan's first ever slasher film. Bryant Chang plays a chauffeur who lands an invite to an exclusive party attended by the rich and beautiful, only to discover that he's a pawn in a sadistic game. As with Did You Hear About The Morgans?, it would be churlish to condemn this film as a torture porn version of Eyes Wide Shut because that's what lovers of the genre want (for the record, the slash quotient measures more than a former Guns N' Roses guitarist standing at a urinal). Similarly, any disgust directed towards the film's barely-concealed misogyny would fall on deaf ears (as would comments about the stunt casting of Japanese adult performer Maria Ozawa in a proper acting role and her not being recognisable her with her clothes on/pixellation off).

Strange but true: the original Ronseal products were developed in the 1950s in Brighton.

Did You Hear About The Morgans? (Sony Pictures Home Entertainment) is released on DVD and Blu-ray on 24th May. Invitation Only (Momentum Pictures) is out now on DVD.

Colin Houlson