After dabbling in TV and film work, forever disillusioned Dylan Moran is back with a brand new stand-up show.
Or as he puts it: "Retouched and air-brushed, the vineyard vampire with the loose cough and the mini-cab odour returns to demand gratuities from the minimum-waged."
The show, Like, Totally Dylan Moran, sees the master of the ironic line tackle, among other things, politics.
"I want to talk about the failure of the systems we all rely upon," he says.
"It's like we're being told, 'It doesn't matter what you think - this is what's going to happen'.
"Everyone needs something to cling on to, whether it's religion or organic food. But those systems keep letting us down."
Star of two sitcoms - the Bafta Award-winning Black Books (which he also wrote) and How Do You Want Me? - and films like A Cock And Bull Story and The Actors, Dylan recently made a well-received Stateside appearance on the David Letterman Show.
Do not be fooled, though. He remains 100 per cent disenchanted with fame: "Is there anybody interested in the celebrity culture any more? People are fed up with what they're being sold by the networks. If you go down to the market and see the same tat every week, you'll get bored. You have to do something different.
"That's why this stand-up show won't be like the previous ones."
Words From The Moran
"Youth leaks from you. It doesn't leave a note or slam the door. You're just left there, older, with dead spiders for eyes and fireretardant hair."
"If you do an accent badly, it is the most distracting thing in the world. It is as if somebody was walking around with their genitals out all the time."
"If someone said, 'We've just come back from our holiday and we had the time of our lives - the food was incomparable, we made love every 45 minutes and got completely bronzed,' you'd be bored rigid. But if they told you they got robbed the moment they stepped off the plane, their hotel wasn't built and they got diarrhoea, you'd be happy to buy them a drink and hear the rest of their story."
"In stand-up, thinking is overrated. If someone says, 'That was really thoughtprovoking,' there's resentment they didn't have a better time. At a comedy show, you don't want to be lectured from on high. That's fatal, like actors telling you what they think about the Dalai Lama."
"If your heart's not in it, you'll only turn out tosh. Look at Dudley Moore - he wound up doing cat food ads. He was a raddled figure in a bathrobe saying, 'Isn't this cat food nice?' You thought, 'God, what happened?'. I wouldn't even get cat-food ads. I'd get toilet paper, or nit combs or heavily medicated yoghurt."
"Some people say I'm grumpy. It's not something I'm aware of. It's not like I walk around poking children in the eye... not very small ones anyway."
"Money can't buy you love but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger biscuits."
"I was too thick for school. Fat tears of boredom rolling sploshing down on the desk in front of me. Terrible books about 300-year-old women living on farms, who only have one potato and have to milk it every morning. I did a bit of drama, though. You know - pretending to be a jacket."
Starts 8pm, tickets £14.50-£17
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