Daughter was doing science tests all last week, leading up to half-term.

This has meant I have had to 'test' her each evening. This, of course, is my absolutely favourite pastime.

I just love to follow a long, hard day at work with a solo walk with the dog in the rain (because she is revising) and then return home to cook the dinner while daughter thrusts chemistry, biology and physics books at me demanding to be tested.

I have become quite adept at continuing to mash potatoes with one hand while the other turns pages and I squint at her books and try to decipher her not terribly neat handwriting.

"Never mind physics and stuff, don't they teach you how to write at that school?" I ask.

"Yes, of course they do," she says, "but that doesn't matter - test me."

We started with biology.

"What is the difference between geotropism and phototropism?" I ask.

"I don't know. We've only just done that today," she says.

"Why don't you know, then?" I ask.

"Because it didn't make any sense," is her reply. "Why didn't you ask then?" I say.

"I don't know. None of us understood it."

Eventually, by the usual drip, drip method of getting information out of her, we discover she does know what it is after all.

The process is painful, though, and I look longingly at the bottle of red wine on the dresser. She tells me no, I can't, at least not until I've finished testing her.

I make a cup of coffee and we move on to physics. This is scary because she understands how to do complicated mathematical type things in order to work out the density of things.

I cannot check whether any of her answers are right because my maths is only as advanced as adding up and taking away.

We move on to Archimedes and his principle, which is something to do with why ships don't sink.

Apparently this is because they have a line drawn on them or something like that.

Luckily we can hear EastEnders music starting in the distance and decide it's time for a break. We head into the living room and I grab my bottle of wine.

The dog is testing out 'Sam's principle' which relates to how one medium-sized smelly dog can fill a sofa that is meant for three people and refuse to let them sit on it.

As his blanket is neglected on the floor and doesn't smell as bad as he does, we sit on that instead.

After EastEnders, it's too late for any more revising. I am glad half- term is here.