If you haven't had a Big Adventure by the time you're 40, you start planning one immediately.

Several of my friends who are approaching early middle age or late adolescence or whatever they call 40-something these days, are hitching up their skirts and making a run for it.

For some it's a physical journey. For others it's spiritual or emotional or intellectual. I've had mine already. It was mostly medical.

Given the choice, I wouldn't have picked heart failure for a big adventure. But now that I've recovered, I can honestly say I am reawakened to the beauty of the world. Hallelujah!

Our close friends, Busby and Helena, both arrive at the two-score landmark this year and it came as no surprise to me to hear they're thinking of abandoning Brighton and heading abroad.

There's nothing particularly wrong with their life here. They have a nice house, a good income and plenty of friends. But they have got it into their heads that they will regret not having lived somewhere else before they get too old.

Their preferred destination is New Zealand, largely because the outdoor life appeals to them. In preparation, they've gone for a few wet jaunts on the Downs to see how their children might take to a more rugged lifestyle.

Busby has admitted it doesn't seem too promising yet. The kids usually manage half a mile before pleading to go home to watch the telly. He is a little concerned for their happiness.

I've told him not to worry. Apparently, the programmes shown on New Zealand TV are much the same as the ones here. In many respects, I doubt the children will regard the experience as an adventure. It's not as if they'll be living in a rain forest eating termites.

It does sound idyllic, though. I have a Kiwi friend, Linley, who spent 15 years in England before returning to her homeland for the sake of her small children.

She phones frequently, because it only costs tuppence ha'penny to call the UK from NZ, to tell me about the exotic birds eating crusts off their decking, or evenings spent with friends in their outdoor spa pool. The quality of life is unsurpassable, she says.

But it's not particularly exciting.

Of course, Linley's big adventure was coming to England. Once that was out of her system, she naturally returned to somewhere warm and familiar.

I would never try to deter Busby and Helena from going, apart from reminding them how much I would miss them. But I would rather they chose an adventure closer to home.

Another friend of mine, Mike, is also looking for the "what next?".

His 40-plus journey was getting his first book published. Unfortunately, it hasn't given him lasting fulfilment and the effort and loneliness of writing it has put him off doing another.

He's now flirting with thoughts of moving to Tuscany and doing the olive grove thing. But he realises this is mainly because winter is such a grim time and there have been too many telly programmes recently about people pursuing dreams to live abroad - and then facing the tough reality.

I've suggested he takes up gardening.

It's creative, it's fulfilling - and if you like tubs, you can have the most wonderful adventures on your own doorstep.