"By the way, I hope you haven't got me a Valentine's card," him indoors said last week, "because I haven't got you one."
"I'm glad to hear romance is still alive and kicking in your veins darling," I replied.
"No, I haven't got you one because I know you are from Yorkshire and therefore are very boring and practical and do not believe in Valentine's Day."
"It's got nothing to do with me being from Yorkshire," he said.
"It's because I think Valentine's Day has nothing to do with love. It's just another example of consumerism gone mad and it's more about shops making loads of money overcharging everyone for flowers that cost twice what they did the week before and for other bits of rubbish with red hearts stuck on them, than it is about anyone expressing deep undying love. You know I love you already, I've told you so."
"Yes, I know, you told me so when daughter was born and then again in 1996, although I can't remember why that time."
Actually, I not only had already got a card but in a moment of madness and at daughter's insistence, I had also bought him a soft toy gorilla which sang "I go ape over you'" when you pressed its right foot.
Not the sort of present the average practical man from Yorkshire would probably appreciate, but daughter and I had thought it kind of cute.
I decided to give them to him anyway. Well, I could hardly keep them for anyone else could I?
In the end he said he loved the gorilla and he loved me too and he made me a cup of tea and brought it to me in bed so what more could a girl want - other than a card and a bunch of flowers of course.
Daughter spent all week debating whether to send any Valentines, then left it too late to post anything so she decided to do it the modern way.
This involved sitting on the computer for hours deliberating over various animated text messages and calling friends for advice before finally choosing one.
Then she used our phone to call the company who send them out and arranged for it to be sent. This has probably added loads of money to our bill but I felt I had to support young love.
I don't know who the recipient of her Valentine was, any more than I know the author of the anonymous card which arrived for her.
At least romance is still alive for some members of the household.
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