In June, my motor scooter was stolen from outside my house in Hollingbury, Brighton.

As someone who has been a victim of theft, I knew all too well the procedures to follow. The insurance company expressed sympathy and promptly sent the claims form and the police gave me a crime number.

Meanwhile, I though I'd assist as much as I could in the investigation into

where my essential mode of transport would be.

The first person I asked pointed me in the direction of Brentwood Drive, behind which, there's a stretch of green land filled with burnt-out cars and scooters.

I saw two scooters, one mine, being recklessly raced across the countryside towards Wild Park. I promptly called the police, who sent "a unit" out. I decided to wait with my phone ready to dial 999.

Twenty minutes later, there it was, my scooter coming towards me, two up. I hit dial, a panic-style explanation followed in desperation for help and my own safety, as the scooter approached me.

The operator asked, "So, where did you say you lived ma'am, is that with a double L?" The fumbling operator's calmness enraged me as much as the sight of my scooter.

Nevertheless, I gave the operator my address and the same accurate directions as I was given to reach the search. The scooter disappeared. I waited back on the main road for 20 minutes - no show from the police at all.

Meanwhile, out of the corner of my eye, in the distance I saw one of them jump a fence, the other was in a tree. Experiencing no fear, only anger, I approached them and after some pretty strong language and negotiation, I retrieved my scooter. Totally unridable.

Later I got two phone messages, first one, "Oh we found your scooter in Wild Park" (good tip-off eh?) second one, "er, actually it's not your scooter".

When I returned their call, next day to say, "Oh, by the way, I got my scooter back and those kids, they're still hanging around my front door", I got, "er, okay, well, PC blah blah, is looking after your case and he's on nights, then he has four days off, then he's on holiday."

That was it. Okay, so that's a month now, nothing at all apart from a feedback form asking me about my ethnic origin, how old I am, etc.

Meanwhile, the scooter is a write-off, the insurance won't pay out more than the "book price" so, with a £100 excess, I stand to get nothing.

A wheel was stolen from my push bike, outside my front door of course. I'm not sure I can be bothered anymore, although I am considering wiring up the railings to the mains supply.

What I'd like to know is, what percentage of my council tax goes the Old Bill? I don't see any improvement in the future. Come on, bobbies on the beat, sort it out. Otherwise, that cash would be better putting a decent bit of regeneration into Hollingdean.

Also, if anyone has recently had a vehicle stolen, the quick way to recover it is to get yourself up to Brentwood Drive or Lychet Close where, behind the skate park, lies the most bitter-sweet piece of land in Brighton and Hove.

-Name and address supplied