As the parent of a four-year-old with a speech delay problem, I find it offensive I am made to feel responsible for my son's disorder.

When we took him for his first assessment in 2003, the speech therapist had decided, before we even walked through the door, his difficulties were because of "low parental interaction" and from watching too much TV.

That my son's passion was Thomas the Tank Engine simply confirmed her diagnosis. Never mind we spent hours reading to him and going on outings.

The fact we owned two Thomas videos led her to conclude my son spent his time "playing with trains and watching videos".

"If you were to just talk to him for 15 minutes a day, he wouldn't have these problems", she added.

The criticisms came thick and fast: Could I not see he was happy playing with toys? Didn't I ever sit down and play with him?

I had to sit there and be treated as if I was clueless about my own son as she suggested toys, such as dollies and teddies, rather than vehicles, were better for encouraging more social interaction.

Despite adding yet more "sociable, fluffy toys" to our already crowded collection, his interest in Thomas rapidly gave way to Buzz Lightyear, any other robots and Daleks.

I requested another assessment, preferably in our home, so they could see we already had the toys they were suggesting.

This was turned down on grounds of cost. Angry our son had been put down for a course of some kind of "parental neglect remedy", we made a formal complaint to the NHS at Brighton General Hospital.

Eight weeks later, the NHS responded. Its verdict was that we simply couldn't accept the "professional" verdict of an experienced speech therapist.

Armed with a letter of support from our son's playgroup, we made an appointment with the head of speech services to get the case reviewed.

We succeeded in getting a fresh assessment but were told to drop the complaint because it was upsetting the therapist concerned.

Is this what they mean by "working in partnership with parents"?

-Sally Reynolds, Hove