"Don't even think about a blue rinse", seethed Antteo as the hairdryer was thrust in his ear.
But the stern-faced Chihuahua from Hove kept his composure throughout a 20-minute rinse and blowdry, while a worker from the Bugsie's Mobile Dog Wash held him in place.
Sarah Price, media relations manager for the Hove-based company, said: "It might seem a bit like His Master's Vice, the way he was held.
"Dogs usually start off feeling a little bit worried when we start cleaning them, but they calm down and begin to enjoy being pampered.
"Most big dogs take about half an hour to do, but Chihuahuas are a lot quicker. It's really important to keep dogs clean at this time of year because they go out and start rolling around in all sorts of things.
"I think Antteo is one of those dogs who doesn't smile a lot however much fun he's having."
The regally-unamused animal was among 19 dogs cleaned in a day by Bugsie's, which visits homes across the Brighton and Hove area in a converted van. The service can be reached on 0800 169 2288.
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