My husband has just had his first dental filling, which, in my book, is something to celebrate.
Especially since I have just had what is probably my 91st. At last, we can compare drill techniques.
At last, his perfect set of gnashers is starting to show its age. The tiny spot of amalgam on one of his back molars is barely visible to the naked eye but we both now know it is there.
Understandably, my husband was saddened to discover his teeth are on the slippery silver slope.
But our new dentist has given him some sound advice about how to brush to avoid plaque build-up and he has bought himself a special toothbrush.
He is now getting to grips with the new technique. This involves vibrating his gums with the bristles and then making a quick, upward or downward movement with the brush, which often results in a splatter of toothpaste and saliva on everything close by.
He then has to spend another five minutes cleaning up.
She gave the same advice to me, too, but after I expressed concerns over the state of our bathroom she suggested that I invest in an electric toothbrush.
Now I thought these went out of fashion 25 years ago, along with mirror tiles and avocado suites. I remember people being ridiculed for owning them. It was then considered as lazy as having a new-fangled dishwasher, or a TV with a remote control. How could anyone possibly not have the time or energy for manual oral hygiene?
But it seems everyone is buying them again, and not just those who relish labour-saving devices. This, apparently, is because the new generation of these toothbrushes are so effective at cleaning that dentists, such as mine, are recommending them to their patients.
As soon as I was out of the surgery I splashed out on one. It has a rechargeable battery and a two-minute timer. I got it home, applied the toothpaste, switched it on, stuck it in my mouth and . . .
Wow! I never imagined brushing your teeth could be so pleasurable. My gums were feeling good, my ivories were polishing up a treat, my fillings were sparkling, all with so little effort from me. What was more - no mess.
When the two-minute timer went off, I kept the brush switched on and did it all over again.
I repeated the experience twice more that evening and woke up the next morning excited by my first trip to the bathroom. A week later, the thrill factor is still there.
My husband, who has never found teeth-cleaning a chore, is suspicious of my new gadget. I am not allowed to keep it on display as the battery charger clutters up the sink surround, he says.
He also does not like it when I spend an unusually long time in the bathroom, especially when he can hear that telltale vibration sound. I offered to let him have a go, but whenever I approach him with the oscillating brush head he shuts his mouth and makes sounds like South Park's Kenny.
I think he is saying: "Get that mmm mmm thing away from me." Anyone would think I was trying to kill him.
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