I was amused to open up The Argus last Friday and see the pretentious people behind Withdean 2000 still have delusions of grandeur.

In an ad describing their club as "The Community Club", they proclaimed the "biggest game in Sussex this weekend" was their match against AFC Wallingford.

The kick-off was apparently at 3pm but, unfortunately, they forgot to state the day.

Clearly, this omission was a fatal error, for the crowds that would have turned up for the "biggest game in Sussex" had to make do with the smaller clubs such as Crawley, Bognor, Hastings or even the Albion, who, although they were hosting mediocre, tiny little dull events, had the foresight to tell the public on which day they were taking place.

-Ferret, "Ferret Talk", seagulls.co.uk