My, oh, my. I came across many a tie

In the charity shop.

My eyes popped out like organ stops -

Ties, all the colours one could find

And a certain gent came into mind.

Wearing one of those, I'd feel a right Richard, to put it politely.

Yes, I am referring, of course, to Richard Whiteley.

I paused in thought ...

A, E, the tie I bought ... IOU 45p.

"Is this a Richard Whiteley job lot, me dear?"

"Oh, no. We get a constant supply here -

In ties these days men don't appear."

My tie, my wit, needs a conundrum, I suppose

So here, dear reader, is one of those:

CANTIFAST?

-Peter Turner, The Drive, Hove