Well done the Worthing branch of the Embroiders' Guild, whose members have toiled like Trojans over the past year to create two wall hangings for our continental cousins.

The magnificent hangings, each approximately 4ft 6in square, consist of many thousands of stitches but nobody knows for certain how many.

They will be presented in due course to civic dignitaries from Worthing's twin areas of Les Sables D'Olonne in France and Elztal in the Black Forest region of Germany.

The French design, on a blue background of course, shows Arundel Castle, which is appropriate because a former Duke of Arundel once held the French fleet at bay in Les Sables D'Olonne when the English and French were exchanging somewhat nasty blows rather than pleasantries.

To mark this rather bumpy era in Anglo-Gallic relations, there is even a fortification in the Atlantic seaside resort called Arundel Tower.

Eileen Blaney, co-ordinator of the project for the Guild, laughed: "Although they have forgiven us they haven't forgotten."

The hanging also has a view of the Old Palace in Tarring, which redresses the balance as the French sometimes raided the ancient village during medieval times.

The Black Forest hanging, on a green backdrop, shows the Dome cinema, formerly the Kursaal, a Germanic name changed during the Great War. It also depicts ballroom dancing at the Pavilion Theatre, reflecting a pastime that is hugely popular in Germany.

Sentinel has never been to Scotland and has no intention of ever going, preferring to spend his money in parts of the world which don't have an anti-English chip on their shoulders.

However, he has no problem with the Beach Hotel in Worthing staging a Burns night, complete with bagpiper, haggis, neeps and tatties, on Saturday.

It should be a splendid occasion, reflecting the time when Worthing actually had a Scottish mayor by the name of Carmichael and a Caledonian Society much patronised by Scotsmen in kilts who expressed undying love of their native land, even if they did prefer to live south of the border.

Sentinel has finally taken the plunge and returned to the Aquarena in a possibly futile bid to avoid the onset of middle-age spread.

It is some years since he dipped his big toe in the pool, but the memories soon flooded back. While the complex has received more than its fair share of criticism of late, there is no doubt that the pool itself, measuring 33m, is the best in Sussex, especially if you are a serious swimmer, but the lack of proper catering facilities is a major problem.

Sentinel was saddened to note that Worthing Lifeguard Corps, which once had fine cabinets to display its trophies in, had been relegated to a small unit under the TV near the vending machines.

Worthing has a flourishing cafe culture courtesy of the relatively recent arrivals of national coffee chains Costa and Caffe Nero, complemented by a fine array of independent cafes and several excellent department store watering holes, notably in Beales and Marks & Spencer.

One wonders how many cups of coffee are served in the town over the course of a year to Worthing's caffeine-addicted populace?

With this in mind, Sentinel embarked on a spot of research which revealed Worthing's first cafe opened in February 1884, near what is now the South Place entrance to the Guildbourne Centre. According to contemporary reports, people previously patronised a mobile barrow, bearing urns of steaming hot coffee, which was parked every morning in South Street.

A company was then set up and shares sold to raise enough cash to acquire and fit-out a building called the Central Coffee Tavern, which boasted "a convenient and comfortable bar, bagatelle and restaurant rooms, a private coffee room for ladies and excellent sleeping accommodation for travellers".

One commentator noted: "Altogether, the place presents a very cheerful and inviting aspect, due regard having been paid to the comfort of the patrons."

The bar, which was run by a manager and two female assistants, was widely welcomed by clergymen in the town, who saw it as an alternative to pubs at a time when drunkenness among the poor was a major problem.

The Reverend EK Elliott said the tavern would not only refresh the body but would also draw out many from the depths of degradation and sin and set them on the right path.