OK I admit it. I am feeling anxious today. I am not sure why I need to make that sound like a confession, but that is the problem with anxiety... it makes you question everything and feel more than a little vulnerable.

For some reason it has been hanging around me for most of the week and I cannot shake it.

Actually the reason is probably very obvious, as I am sure many of us are feeling wobbly some, if not all, of the time at the moment.

If I had to pinpoint its source from my perspective, it would likely be the constant feeling of uncertainty and lack of control over the situation.

Because of my deadline, I am writing this ahead of Boris’s announcement so I am yet to hear of any plans to ease lockdown or amend the rules we have been following for the best part of two months. So I guess the not knowing, then playing out every possible scenario in my head, depending on the announcement, is what is troubling me right now.

Of course I understand the need to restart our economy and save as many jobs as possible, but there are lives at stake here and the balancing act is one so precarious it does not bear thinking about.

Many of my friends are now in a position where it is looking unlikely they will have a job to go back to, and business owners, my husband included, face many months of stress and hardship as they battle to keep staff and stay afloat.

From the start, I felt we should have locked down a lot sooner and a lot harder, taking a leaf out of Spain’s book, as difficult as that may have been.

I feel like we have been given a little too much leeway and some have interpreted the rules to suit themselves, with no thought or consideration to anyone else.

While the majority of us have played fair and stuck to the restrictions in place, there have been far too many incidences of people taking matters into their own hands, secretly visiting friends and family, not keeping their distance when out and about and making countless unnecessary journeys.

If the rules had been clearer and stricter, there would have been no room for interpretation and we might have flattened the curve here much quicker.

It would have saved more lives that is for sure, and we might not be looking at such a long and protracted process to get us all back to normal.

I was out for a run during what was once rush hour this morning and the roads were too busy. At one point I completely changed my route because I could see what was essentially a crowd of people ahead of me.

It was like any busy weekday morning, not a scene from a country on lockdown in the middle of a global pandemic.

By the time I got home I was in a right state. OK that may have been more to do with the fact I am rubbish at running, but all the same I was not happy about it.

Now there is talk of workplaces opening up again and a potential return for schools in the coming weeks and I just do not feel like we are ready for it. Public transport is going to be a major issue for a start, unless they start taking seats out of buses and running an awful lot more trains and tubes just to give people space from each other.

Can you imagine using the London Underground right now? No thanks.

As for schools returning, that gives me full blown heebie-jeebies. They are hotbeds of germs at the best of times and kids are hardly the most hygienic of creatures are they?

I must remind my son ten times a day to put his hand over his mouth if he coughs, sneezes or even burps and as for wiping his nose on his sleeve or the neck of his T-shirt... gross.

He has had it drummed into him to wash his hands properly these past couple of months, but I know for a fact if he is distracted by his classmates, there is no way he is going to stand at the sink for 20 seconds, carefully lathering up and scrubbing every millimetre of his filthy little paws.

As for keeping them two metres apart in class or in the playground, the poor teachers do not stand a chance. My neighbour teaches in Year 2 at a nearby school and has been going in on a rota basis to teach key worker children while their heroic parents and carers look after the rest of us. She only has four children in the whole year currently, but trying to keep them apart and not be able to comfort them if they are upset or have hurt themselves is virtually impossible.

Have you ever tried to tie a kid’s shoelaces from six feet away? Exactly.

Can we just have a little more lockdown? Please.