Now what?

At the beginning, as with all beginnings, it was exciting and scary and full of possibility. I worked hard to put aside my fears, make new connections and try out new experiences. I took the approach recommended by Herminia Ibarra in her book Working Identity, by 'crafting experiments' ie trying things out. I studied psychology and creativity, sang, wrote, meditated, made new friends and worked for one of the most creative and innovative theatre companies (albeit in arts administration). I learned something from each of these. And I'm still not much clearer about what to do next; it remains misty. I can't answer the question "what would you LIKE to do?". This makes it very difficult for anyone to help me. For a period, I was happy with not knowing; it seemed part of the process. Now it's just irritating me. I've allowed myself the summer to let go of seeking for a while and hoping this won't just drift into laziness and a loss of confidence. I've wheeedled myself back into my comfort zone. Perhaps I needed to have a break. But I'm very conscious of the need to stretch myself again.

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